Philabuster's List



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Air - Pocket Symphony The Rakes - Ten New Messages !!!-Myth Takes
Arcade Fire - Neon Bible Dr. Dog - We All Belong LCD Soundsystem - Sound Of Silver












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Welcome to BadmintonStamps. We're Philabuster and SkinnySlim, representing Philly and NYC respectively. We are very good looking. Thanks.

March 30, 2007


It's Time To Get Away


The proprietors of this domain are currently engrossed in major disco infiltration activities. But we'll be back in 72 short ones with an absolutely monster week.







March 29, 2007


Everybody's Doing It This Weeekend In Philly


Forget about whatever abomination is headlining tonight at the
church basement. You only need to understand one thing: Tokyo Police Club. They're back in town for the first time since the first time, which was no doubt as special for you as it was for us. The show tonight is way sold out, so you'll probably want to show up early if you're gonna lie/sneak/fuck your way in. Which, by the way, you will totally do if you have any kind of self-respect whatsoever.

To be honest, the whole baile funk thing kinda baile flew over our heads. But if it's your stizz, who are we to judge? Upstairs at Sal's is the newly announced destination for all your Bonde Do Role craziness.

You'll have to bust out the sad puppy dog eyes again on Friday night if you want to get into Johnny Brenda's, 'cause tickets for Menomena are gone like yr innocence. Along for the ride are comin' up-ers Land Of Talk, who continue the astounding trend of Canadian bands that quite simply refuse to suck. More on them later.

Just for the Nick Drake of it, One AM Radio take it nice and easy at the Circle of Hope.

And of course, Making Time. Head over to Pure and get rad the way only Norwegians let you. Datarock (pic'd) sport all the classic electro-grooves you've come to expect from a trip to sexjamland, then sleeze 'em up so unapologetically that even Electric Six would blush a little bit. But just a little bit.




Starve A Cold Streak


You may have noticed that, over the past week or so, BadmintonStamps has been skinnier than SkinnySlim. If we've lost some weight, please know it's because we've been very sick.
Like Bruce Dickinson before us, we've got a fever. Unlike Bruce Dickinson (but very much like Philadelphia Weekly), ours is Baseball Fever. Opening day is just around the corner. The epic tease of spring training has left the 'Stamps boys and fans world-wide seriously jonesin' for the real thing. And as any kindly midwestern knitting circle will tell you, you feed a fever. Also dishing out this sage advice: the Los Angeles Dodgers. For the 2007 season, Dodger management has unveiled new all-you-can-eat seating for it's most gluttonly patrons. There are some restrictions, of course, so the operation will probably turn a profit even in such a body-concious city. And LA fans are notorious for leaving the game early, so perhaps the kind of food coma brought on by eating twelve Dodger Dogs in two hours was seen as a last resort. That said, if Kobayashi starts following the club and coming to home stands, their bottom line is pretty much fucked.




Thursday Photo Essay


Barn Owl Breakfast


(
Photo Credit)




Thursday Photo Essay


Encore!


(
Photo Credit)

Download: Travis - "Sing"


March 27, 2007


No Diggerity


Yesterday came news that the death of Anna Nicole Smith was
accidental, or as accidental as a combination of nine prescription drugs can be. The whole affair is tragedy from many angles, not least of which is that in some way the death of the bulbous tittumed Anna Nicole represents the death of the gold digger. The embodiment of marrying up, Mrs. Smith was the last of a dying breed, and it seems like the good ol' days of a breastilicious stripper marrying a senile sugar daddy oil tycoon are gone. A tradition as old and rich as old and rich men themselves, the gold digger was murdered not by silicone or the combination of nine prescription drugs, but rather by two major social developments. First, just as the birth control pill killed the prude, Viagra has slaughtered the weak stomached social climbing woman. These young, vital, bosomly creatures now actually have to fuck the creepy old jerks they marry. That weeds out the less ambitious diggettes, but it's still not enough to deter the most determined money hungry sex kittens out there. Enter the pre-nup. Once a novelty, this egregious American Dream-killing legal document strikes fear in the heart of sensual shallow ladies everywhere. I mean, what kind of world do we live in where a cosmetically well-endowed sex object with no real sense of self worth or ethical backbone can't get ahead on physical prowess and emotional manipulation? A world, boys and girls, that sadly isn't made for all us Anna Nicoles out there.




March 26, 2007


The Pony Track Is Wearing Feathers


Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!



March 23, 2007


Kontinental Air


Next time you're stuck on an airplane somewhere between the moon and New York City, waiting to land at Idlewild and doing flyovers for what seems like days, soft rock hero Christopher Cross will change your life. He knows that in the most frustrating of transportation moments, the best you can do is fall in love. And Christopher Cross is going to sing his heart out until you've snagged the beauty in 27D. Once you've fallen for that hottie across the aisle, you're going to want to jump for joy. But Christopher Cross can't help you with that. He's got you buckled in securely, and honestly, hasn't he done enough already? This is where Kriss Kross comes in. They're going to rip off your safety belt, take off your clothes, put your clothes on backwards, and have you po-going up 'n down those aisles with your new paramour until the flight attendant sedates you with taser on suspicion of terrorism. When you wake up you'll be ready to claim your luggage and take on the legal system. But most importantly, thanks to the Chris Krosses, you'll be ready to do it with that special someone.



March 22, 2007


Thursday Photo Essay


See What Develops





Thursday Photo Essay


How Are The Mountains Off The Harbor?


(
Photo Credit)

Download: Dr. Dog - "Alaska"


March 21, 2007


Premature Eclapulation


The time has come to address a serious epidemic in the concert going community: The Early Clap. Known in the medical world as E.C., the condition is defined by the New England Medical Journal as "the act of applauding a song before its conclusion." Not to be confused with
the clap, this syndrome displays the ignorance of its victim, causing embarrassment when surrounded by "hip" "scenesters". Short term effects include sheepish looks and hands in pockets. Long term effects are general tentativeness and dance avoidance. Unfortunately, no one is immune from an E.C. attack, and onset can occur at any time. The greatest risk for the chronic early clapper is the false ending. It's hard not to have sympathy for an E.C. victim as they slap their sweaty hands together when a particularly strong tune ends abruptly, only to see them watch in horror as the band launches into its groove once more (see below song). Still, the Early Clap can be prevented. One must train themselves to avoid the temptation of impressing fellow concert goers by being the first and most enthusiastic crowd member. Patience is a virtue, especially when applause is involved. Remember, you are trying to show appreciation to the band. They will wait for your reaction, and would prefer it to be sustained and raucous, rather than quick and limp.




This Charming Band


Succesfully paying homage to/ripping off another artist can be a pivotal step in any musician's career. It all comes down to two questions: who do you rip off, and how? It's easy to see why The Smiths have been such an easy answer to the first. Need to establish your band's relevance to that demographic goldmine of sensitive, bookish, darkly humored vegetarians? Just toss off a
cover version of "There Is A Light That Never Goes Out" and watch those animal rights activists' eyes light up. Those looking for a more nuanced approach can forgo the cover in favor of cover art. Acts ranging from Cyndi Lauper to Platic Little have all been able to express their love of The Smiths and, by extension, 1950's French Cinema, through some unassuming puddle-side poses. Then you've got non-traditionalists like Modest Mouse, who dispense with all the subtleties and just go out and get themselves an actual Smith. At present, however, my favorite Smithly gesture comes from charming Swedish pop massive The Gray Brigade, who've taken the Mozzer's classic begger and judiciously chopped off one "Please" from the title. Also, they wrote a totally different song.



March 20, 2007


Danielle Weezy, Official Hot Chick SXSW Correspondent


Last week was the official cool kids' music too-dah, aka South By Southwest. Unfortunately, SkinnySlim and Philabuster don't attend because we prefer to stay out of the limelight and have no interest in being mobbed by fans/artists. Fortunately, hottie and math major Danielle Weezy was kind enough to tell us what bands we should pretend to like until mid-April when we can then pretend to hate them.

Note: The views expressed by our correspondents do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the editors, especially when ratted beehives are involved.

1) Which band/artist looked the most ridiculous?

amy winehouse; girl needs to a) eat more/do less drugs and get some jeans that fit, b) wear less eyeliner, and c) not style her hair in a ratted beehive.

2) Which band/artist seemed the most intoxicated?

a) black lips -- their guitarist was seen throwing up off the side of the stage during their performance
b) cheeseburger -- their lead singer was spitting beer into the audience and telling such absurd stories that the rest of the band would start to play while he was mid-sentence to get him to shut up; their set lasted 15 minutes.

3) Unlike everybody who has ever been to Texas, you're a vegetarian and you're pro choice. Why do you value the life of tuna more than the life of human babies?

i'm from california and a democrat

4) If you could join any band that you saw, which one would it be and what instrument would you play?

i'd play drums for fujiya & miyagi as a friend was disappointed to see their absence of a drummer and i hate to see my friends sad. [note: i do not know how to play the drums]

5) What's 17 times 9?

the same as 9 x 17; 153.

6) Divided by 3?

153/3 = 51, but 6/3 = 2. and 2*51=102, but 2^51=2,251,799,813,685,250

7) Show off. They call math "maths" in England, which is grammatically correct but pretty lame. Speaking of lame, what's the best British band you saw at the Festival?

the good, the bad & the queen

8) Which band/artist was so good that you would kill your parents, or even a tuna, to see again?

Y.A.C.H.T., or maybe the gossip, whose shows includes both live music and flesh as beth is/was prone to taking off her dress mid-set



March 19, 2007


The Pony Track Ain't Spillin'


Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!



March 16, 2007


Make It Lame


There is a recent phenomena among flamboyant African American southern strip club goers called "making it rain." This clever activity involves taking a large stack of bills, climbing onto the strip club stage, and throwing said bills in the air creating a precipitation-like effect. This frugal investment of ends has lead to legions of happy strippers below the Mason Dixon. Making it rain has recently gained in notoriety thanks to the R. Kell-erific hit hip-hop song that the baddest boys in the blogosphere posted Charlemagne-style last month. Listen
here. Also last month, star NFL cornerback Pacman Jones decide to make it rain in a Las Vegas strip club. Actually, he decided to make it pour, $81,000 worth. But after the storm, Pacman gobbled up the bills like he was chasing ghosts. When a stripper tried to pick up some cake, he politely told her that the shower was for visual effect only. Then he allegedly grabbed her hair and slammed her face against the bar. Long charming story short, a member of Pacman's entourage shot a security guard, paralyzing him. The question pondered by enquiring minds across this land is whether Pacman was in violation of make it rain etiquette when he retrieved his droplets of cash. Thankfully Miami legend and strip club expert Luther Campbell of 2 Live Crew fame explained all things make it rain on a recent radio show. Please do yourself a service and listen to his deeply educational and hysterical interview. And remember kids, if you can't stand the rain get the hell out the club.



March 15, 2007


Thursday Photo Essay


High Times


(
Photo Credit)

Download: Foals - "Balloons"



Thursday Photo Essay


Nighttime Is The Right Time




March 14, 2007


Rich Fravel: The Capitalist Pig's Banksy


The black and white Rich Fravel
caricature that kept pointing at us from the blogad-ridden recesses of localy relevant web hangs, and occaisionally even here on the 'Stamps, always seemed a bit disconcerting, sure. But it wasn't until his latest creative hit the sidebars that the reason became evident. Suffice to say, the differnece between bourgeoius capitalist real estate mogul and subversive anti-establishment graffiti artist has never been so comically sharp.



Now, if some brash young upstart wanted to substitute this little girl with a jump rope for Ben Franklin with a kite string and hit up a wall somewhere in Port Richmond...well, then you'd have an installation that would rival The Gross Clinic. Or at least the Rocky statue.



March 13, 2007


Skinny Jaguar Slim


It's hard to hate on John Mellencamp. He does his thing and he does it competently. But for all his general good guy decentness, in the end he'll always be a pop tart version of the Boss. That's because Mellancamp is to Springsteen what Coldplay is to Radiohead; a watered down version your imaginary daughter likes. This is of course assuming that you have an imaginary daughter. I recommend getting one if you haven't already. My imaginary daughter is eleven years old, her favorite movies are Ferris Bueller's Day Off and Splendor in the Grass, she reads Teen Vogue although it's a little advanced for her but she wants to seem cool, and she loves converse sneakers and Mellencamp. She's a pretty cool girl and I love her to pieces. And seeing her imaginary smile when this song comes on convinces me that I love the Mellencamp too. I mean, sure he's not in the same league as Bruce Springsteen, but at least he takes a dump on Bryan Adams.



March 12, 2007


Sun Of A Bitch


Gratitude is due where gratitude is due, so let's give a big ole Texas Hee-Haw dignified New England thank you to George W. Bush. Sure, some would say he's almost George W. Bushian in his incompetence, arrogance, and incompetence, but without King George today this country would be a little darker a little earlier. That's because our President made a wise and popular decision when he signed the massive energy bill back in '05. Amid the bill's 550 pages was a provision for Daylight Savings to arrive three weeks early (and extend one week in the fall). It was all in the name of saving energy, which means private jet flying Presidential loser and environmental do-gooder Al Gore is going to have to shut his mouth, which is currently full of food. Dude is
fat, by the way. And he eats with his mouth open. But I digress. Daylight Savings is commonly known as "Night Shift New Year's" because of the absence of a 2AM. This means your doorman and train conductor were extra drunk/coked up on Saturday night. Daylight Savings is also known to non-farmers everywhere as the psychological start to the season of warmth and happiness. So in this dark, cold time marred by White House convictions, Military Hospital scandals, and Iraqi civil war, we all owe a debt to our President for making the long winter a bit more light.




The Pony Track Fights For Poseidon


Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!



March 8, 2007


March Radness Kicks Off This Weekend In Philly


Spinto who? Wilmington's The Sky Drops are nu-gazing all over your nice new carpet tonight at
The M Room. There's always an extremely fine line in this genre between awesome and painfully craptacular. Happily, Drops duo Rob and Monika fall very clearly on the awesome side of the spectrum. Be there tonight to have all your Catherine Wheel wishes and Bloody Valentine dreams fulfiled.

Friday night at Making Time, it's Crystal Castles downstairs, Simian Mobile Disco (pic'd) upstairs, and radness everywhere you look. Adding fuel to the fire, it's also the unofficial birthday party of one Aaron "Pony" Child. If the idea of dancing your face off next to the man behind The Track isn't enough to get your juices flowing, then maybe you should just stay in and work on that jigsaw puzzle after all. It'll be better for everyone.

Saturday night, cool kids are doing the Girard Ave shuffle. Swedish pop rockers (redundant, I know) The Faintest Ideas are the second act on a 7:30 PM all-ages bill. How they found their way to The Fire is anybody's guess, but their economical bursts of REM gone punk might make for the biggest and blondest surprise of your weekend. Then head over to Johnny Brenda's, where The Capitol Years and El Dorado are the local bread on either side of a beefy Boggs sandwhich. Twitchin' in the kitchen indeed.

Just to prove once and for all that we're out of the February show doldrums, Sunday night comes at you with the blistering heat of even more Scandanavians. Norway's 120 Days make their Philly debut at Johnny Brenda's, mixing Kraftwerk electro-grooves with the sort of unapologetic guitar mow-downs that were the best (read: only) thing going for Black Rebel Motorcycle Club. New York's Shout Out Out Out Out are along for the ride.




The Girlfriend Track Wants To Hold You


The Girlfriend Track is song that SkinnySlim deems sexy for a lady to feel. We're talking about songs where, if my girl said "Yo, turn this up", I would be turned on.

If your girlfriend doesn't like this song then it's time to dump your girlfriend.





Thursday Photo Essay


Out With Gout '88


(
Photo Credit)




Thursday Photo Essay


Rittenhouse Birdman


(
Photo Credit)



March 6, 2007


Bob Woodruff Would Also Have Been A Poor Choice





The New Playlist Is Random Like Something That Is Random


Worst Badminton post title ever? Probably. Anyway, the long long awaited new playlist is up. The theme of this group of fine tunes is "If SkinnySlim Had An Ipod This Might Play On Shuffle But He Would Be Surprised No Hip Hop Came On But Would Still Be Happy Cause Its Really Good." Enjoy!



March 5, 2007


Extra Whipped Cream And Kale


For all of us livng around this great land, tomorrow is officially known as Arcade Fire's
Neon Bible Day. The Fire's much anticipated second album is a certified (by me) triumph, so make sure to pick it up at your local record store/internet hangout. In honor of one of the standout tracks, the two part "Black Wave/Bad Vibrations", I present three other songs that also have two parts. In all four songs the first section is no doubt good for you, albeit somewhat jarring, difficult, or imperfect. But like an ice cream sundae served after a plate of bitter herbs, part two delivers that sweet sweet satisfaction. On Beck's b-side "Arabian Nights", we are treated to some ridiculous Midnite Vultures era campy rap that leads into a chilling, cinematic coda. "I'm Sticking With You", from Velvet Underground's "lost" V.U. album, starts all too-cutesy Mo Tucker-like, but climaxes all beautiful souring Lou Reed-like. Finally we have all time SkinnySlim faves Stereolab. Their eight minute epic "Space Moth" comes on like an electro rock fart machine, but part two smoothly segues into...well...a super funky electro rock fart machine. And when it comes to electro farts we all like 'em extra super funky.


You heard it here first: fart machines are the new guitars.



The Pony Track Ain't Scared Of The Water


Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!



March 2, 2007


You Don't Spell It Pickel


If I had a nickel for everytime someone said, "If I had a nickel...", I'd have like, thirty six dollars. Which is not that much money. It's basically the price of a nice dinner. But I don't even know if it would be worth it, because the "If I had a nickel...I'd be a millionaire" phrase is pretty special education. What's worse, the phenomenon of the nickel phrase has gotten way out of control. It really slips my banana peel to hear these fifteen year old kids today, all hopped up on God knows what, going around with their Blackberries, Skittles, and Sega Genesises whining, "If I had a nickel for everytime someone called me special ed I'd be a millionaire." No you wouldn't. Are you a fucking retard? Someone would have had to say that to you literally five twenty million times. At a minimum. That means you would have to hear it 913.242 3652.96 times a day, or 38.05 152.2 times an hour. That doesn't even include sleep or ipod time, when people may be saying it to you but you can't hear them. And we call ourselves The Greatest Country in The World? Luckily, old fashioned luddites The White Stripes have a
new album coming out that will teach our youngsters some respect and linguistics. For example, on this song they use the word rumpus. Rumpus! How great is that? I mean, if I had a nickel for everytime I heard someone use rumpus in conversation, I wouldn't have enough bread to take the bus. Which is a shame. A shame that Jackie White is trying to change. Because Jackie White doesn't want me, or you for that matter, to be stranded without bus fare. He's just that kind of hero.






March 1, 2007


Rock Out With Your Crock Out This Weekend In Philly


Tonight, two new hot shots are tearing it up in the minor league indie pop circuit known as
The M Room. The Neighborhood Choir are all about the sort of shambly-yet-polished guitar wash that hasn't rung through these parts since the last Ambulance Ltd appearance. Meanwhile, Movable Type administer a heady dose of Vitamin Uke to that bouncy jangle pop formula we all know Philly has on lock. Quote from the band: "we're more like a crock pot than a pressure cooker." A-fucking-men.

Friday night, Badmaster Records is throwing a label-showcasing, vinyl-releasing, Pony Pants-headlining, birthday-bashing Johnny Brenda's clusterfuck.

Saturday night, Brrr is on the loose at the Veggieplex Theater. An ever-morphing collective of locals, you can think of them as the Broken Social Scene of Philly jangle, and Herbie from Brown Recluse Sings is their Dave Newfeld. Which, incidentally, is why we always remind him to never buy drugs in New York.

And hey, [click.] at Medusa Lounge is never not a good time.




Thursday Photo Essay


"He Used To Pee As Other Dogs Do"


(Read the
full story of this truly amazing animal)




Thursday Photo Essay


How It Starts....And How It Ends


(
Photo Credit)



SkinnySlim's List



In Rotation...

LCD Soundsystem - Sound Of Silver Arcade Fire - Neon Bible Klaxons - Myths Of The Near Future
Nice And Smooth - Ain't A Damn Thing Changed Amy Winehouse - Back To Black The Rolling Stones - Exile On Main Street